Communication problems are the most common reason for couples to seek counselling and very often these communication breakdowns point to deeper issues that need to be addressed in order to regain connection and acceptance of eachother once again.
Our relationships are in fact our biggest playing field of learning and often the journey is not an easy one.
Much of the difficulty we experience in relationships is related to unresolved emotional triggers from the past that escalate quickly into what seems like two warring factions. The one we love becomes the enemy.
As we settle into the relationship our emotional reactions and projections start to get in the way which causes one or both partners to shut down and avoid discussion over the issues. This causes a block to be wedged, energetically between the couple and so communication begins to shut down and resentments form.
Our ability to sustain our relationships is a challenge for many of us. We search for the love of our life to fulfil us within and without and we don’t really give much consideration to the fact that our partners also, have their own set of defences and reactions and unfinished business from their life’s experiences which will have an impact on the relationship in some way shape or form.
By having a growing awareness of what underlies our relationship and personal difficulties, making some decisions and commitment to bring about the changes within us and between us, we can create positive and lasting change which will allow for more meaning and depth to the relationship that we may not have expected or considered.
[Holistic Counselling] A more Holistic Approach to Couples Counselling…..
Since humans are multi-dimensional and multi-faceted, I believe it is important to work and interact with all these parts of ourselves bringing them into the awareness. Having a deeper understanding of what energies are at play within us, will give us the power to make informed choices and decisions in our lives. We can then be comfortable with our decisions and be more empowered to express them as to our loved ones and the world at large.
As I journey with you and your partner, I will bring to your awareness some aspects about your relationship that is designed to question if these dynamics are lacking in your relationship:
Is there any space in the relationship to communicate freely with each other your wants and needs?
Consider how much real communication time you have with each other. I am referring here to the unspoken concerns and issues, are they addressed openly honouring the others viewpoint?
- Do your reactions and projections get in the way of open communication and intimacy?
- How much of what is going wrong in the relationship can you own and what should lie with your partner?
- Do you feel supported by your partner not only within your family but also within a social context?
- Have you shut down your heart centre to your partner? When we are caught up in our heads and reactions this tends to happen
- Do you ever stop to look deeply at your needs and intentions in the relationship? What is it you really want?
- How often do you confront your issues in the relationship with love and compassion?
- Do you feel safe enough in the relationship to be vulnerable?
- How often do your emotions get in the way when trying to speak your truth?
- How strong are your boundaries in your relationship? Does your partner manipulate you?
If you make a choice to experience this journey with me, I will offer you support, guidance and compassion as you experience the deeper layers of yourselves and your partnership. You will discover a more meaningful and purposeful connection to yourselves and a transformation in your relationships.